tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3243968224174925702024-03-13T22:18:51.486-06:00 A Skewed View ... a quirky look at day-to-day life ...Debrahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13880320036500746309noreply@blogger.comBlogger238125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-324396822417492570.post-58033871300322263342023-10-04T17:01:00.001-06:002023-10-04T17:01:41.364-06:00A Debbie at her Deepest<p>Think about Facebook for a moment.</p><p>Are you thinking about it?</p><p>Okay. Hear me out here. When you look through your newsfeeds, seeing all the things your friends post -- the thoughts they express, the novelties that tickle their funny bones, the issue-windmills against which they are tirelessly compelled to tilt -- you realize how very, truly, inexplicably you yourself are fractured into tiny personalities, each being expressed by the hearts and minds of the friends you chose.</p><p>Done. Thanks for bearing with me. Now it is dinner time. Carry on in my absence, oh bitty pieces of myself.</p><p>Oh. What if none of my friends exist and my FB newsfeed is truly a manifestation of the varied corners of my own mind? (The hairs on my forearms just stood up.)</p>Debrahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13880320036500746309noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-324396822417492570.post-18626634259759065052023-09-19T13:46:00.004-06:002023-09-19T13:55:58.519-06:00What an End to a Season!<p> I know I've been <i>Cancer Girl</i> — and her subset personality, <i>Survivor Team Dragon Boat Paddler Girl</i> — of late. I won't apologize for someone I am proud to be, but I will promise to get back to <i>Creative Writing Girl</i> now.</p><p>No. It's not because the paddling season is over. Why do you ask?</p><p>But since you <i>did</i> ask: What an end to our season! A fabulous weekend paddling at the Penticton Dragon Boat Festival. The weather was quite cooperative, and the water was helpfully calm (which I'm told is unusual for Penticton).</p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen='allowfullscreen' webkitallowfullscreen='webkitallowfullscreen' mozallowfullscreen='mozallowfullscreen' width='320' height='266' src='https://www.blogger.com/video.g?token=AD6v5dxUm9sGJ8WYrgp81XJ4xL3dhyMl23bSHDpou7gImOQslki5Q5UsMyxg04vv-kNR2SoVErezgsfis661Xtf7Kw' class='b-hbp-video b-uploaded' frameborder='0'></iframe></div><p>Our hotel was right on Lake Okanagan and the sunrises looked like our race jerseys. It was like a four day vacation... I just had to paddle two to three 500 metre races a day in exchange! </p><p>For my troubles, I came home with a Third Place medal (for the survivors' race), a Second Place ribbon (for placement in our division), and a beautifully painted tile (from groomeart.com) as souvenirs.</p><p>A good, good season.</p><p><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiIdxW4Nxu2mvq5aOTZgvkiQHazVkUet0H4pZyl3dGsfkCK577Nztt4YQFNj0NcSFCTFUt_XUOfiYITgJGMf8v2OijQTaKqy5Au4Xu7gPvpiQLyFaXhQMB2IGSehguaAVGuKJJwFb-lP77N33ZA7e9B49yVqWR_RZysR-GcXW8-j7asqWs2KLwFACBGVUE/s2048/Hotel%20View%20-%20sunrise.jpg" style="clear: right; display: inline; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em; text-align: center;"><img border="0" data-original-height="2048" data-original-width="1536" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiIdxW4Nxu2mvq5aOTZgvkiQHazVkUet0H4pZyl3dGsfkCK577Nztt4YQFNj0NcSFCTFUt_XUOfiYITgJGMf8v2OijQTaKqy5Au4Xu7gPvpiQLyFaXhQMB2IGSehguaAVGuKJJwFb-lP77N33ZA7e9B49yVqWR_RZysR-GcXW8-j7asqWs2KLwFACBGVUE/s320/Hotel%20View%20-%20sunrise.jpg" width="240" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhmc8nnUyYt6u5c0ZEmeQ7wLo9iiz8BYDoMd9QLdDh2ySZdyMV0Uk7K-1nXFxF2g9iXK5D6CjdmMmnN4Sl-5imyMK5Nmke5IK0_GmR6bWYJL2KL5V5LtXDI8AAreHpMkcsnzpG2jDoG3B-wLzzQ9Xx1txEXi5n_BIM5r-9NZ9trcWQfKFQTqlI5lwzcm9Y/s2048/Hotel%20View%20-%20lake.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="2048" data-original-width="1536" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhmc8nnUyYt6u5c0ZEmeQ7wLo9iiz8BYDoMd9QLdDh2ySZdyMV0Uk7K-1nXFxF2g9iXK5D6CjdmMmnN4Sl-5imyMK5Nmke5IK0_GmR6bWYJL2KL5V5LtXDI8AAreHpMkcsnzpG2jDoG3B-wLzzQ9Xx1txEXi5n_BIM5r-9NZ9trcWQfKFQTqlI5lwzcm9Y/s320/Hotel%20View%20-%20lake.jpg" width="240" /></a></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiRop2ocokrP-tUxqKyvx80kHQyw42cRb2oV70aDowUmlLtT3f__zVe9vB-9UEp5lhFIAN8GC976p94Tv3YgROAqb3KyGIVqc466xd4e3tcAEj70niOtolRilwbqPgKwYgOLSQvHxQWoYaDPtup4CjT5kH2C9TiB_7e_pa2JGIkH9BeCYCuDrTJPcxxVd8/s2048/Trophies.jpg" style="display: inline; margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><img border="0" data-original-height="2048" data-original-width="1536" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiRop2ocokrP-tUxqKyvx80kHQyw42cRb2oV70aDowUmlLtT3f__zVe9vB-9UEp5lhFIAN8GC976p94Tv3YgROAqb3KyGIVqc466xd4e3tcAEj70niOtolRilwbqPgKwYgOLSQvHxQWoYaDPtup4CjT5kH2C9TiB_7e_pa2JGIkH9BeCYCuDrTJPcxxVd8/s320/Trophies.jpg" width="240" /></a></div><div></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><br />Debrahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13880320036500746309noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-324396822417492570.post-34090046595641047812023-08-29T14:39:00.002-06:002023-08-29T14:39:18.097-06:00Socks Key to Surviving Heat Waves<p>Fortunately, Calgary does not suffer the moist, oppressive heat of a Toronto summer. For the times it aspires to do so, though, I offer you the most important lesson I learned while melting in the sickeningly-sticky, only-in-its-own-mind centre-of-the-Canadian-universe city: the humble sock is the answer you seek.</p><p>(That, and the presence of wheels on an air conditioner the size of a small freezer should not categorize that unit as "portable".)</p><p>Of particular salvation is this four-step sock system:</p><p>(1) Soak socks in cold water so they are wet, but not dripping.</p><p>(2) Put socks on feet</p><p>(3) Dangle feet off couch or ottoman or bed so air can circulate around them</p><p>(4) Feel heat being wicked away through your feet</p><p>* Bonus points if you can point a fan at your dangling feet.</p><p>(Stuffing your sports bra with sock-wrapped ice packs works well, to — but that wasn't learned until after I had moved to Calgary.)</p>Debrahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13880320036500746309noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-324396822417492570.post-78342152735494065572023-08-20T10:24:00.001-06:002023-08-20T10:24:16.860-06:00Lucky 55 (fingers crossed)<p>If you think about it, the "20 Under 20" or "30 People Who Will Change the World" had a level path to their titles. It's simple to be remarkable when life hasn't had time to take its shot at you yet. If you're not at risk of buckling under the weight of decades of <i>so close</i>, or <i>not quite</i>, or <i>holy crap what did I think was going to happen when I did that</i>, then how far you can put one foot in front of the other doesn't impress me much. Show me someone who's spent more years than these list recipients were alive tripping over their dreams, especially if they never took the hint to stay down. That's the real motivational figure.</p><p>I think this year might be mine for the taking. For my 55th time around the sun, I might finally get my ducks beak-to-tail, as they say. Of course, maybe I'm looking at one more year herding cats. Lord knows, I've been wrong before. But here's to not staying down... and birthday ice cream. Always birthday ice cream!</p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEio5rax2ypn_OutGdB3aCadgSoVdy8ghA4j6yhCXrtknog0U0QV0NVbpz1Pfr44gFurO58qFOCt6vUzNjlanefcS8blhmpGy99kkKHKnnpIuRWMF6CxcyX56SyMCnQc9CyuuD1StfS75ps6T1mO0hIGky6hoWlVl4rzZCTIygaYbL3JupHiP_Fj6-7K3ow/s3264/20220822_155542.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="3264" data-original-width="2448" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEio5rax2ypn_OutGdB3aCadgSoVdy8ghA4j6yhCXrtknog0U0QV0NVbpz1Pfr44gFurO58qFOCt6vUzNjlanefcS8blhmpGy99kkKHKnnpIuRWMF6CxcyX56SyMCnQc9CyuuD1StfS75ps6T1mO0hIGky6hoWlVl4rzZCTIygaYbL3JupHiP_Fj6-7K3ow/s320/20220822_155542.jpg" width="240" /></a></div><br /><p></p>Debrahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13880320036500746309noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-324396822417492570.post-21369006585242164052023-08-07T16:08:00.002-06:002023-08-07T16:20:36.992-06:00It'll Take a While<p><span style="font-family: courier;">Almost three and a half years ago, I asked here if a 50-year-old can learn to paddle a dragon boat. Then COVID hit. So, truth is, yes: A 50-year-old can learn to paddle a dragon boat. She’ll just have to wait a couple years to actually get on the Glenmore Reservoir to do it. But, once there… well, it will work out quite nicely. </span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">Two paddling seasons and five medals later, I'm itching for this weekend -- the <a href="https://calgarydragonboatsociety.com/festival/" target="_blank">Calgary Dragon Boat Race & Festival</a> -- to begin! </span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhWCzvWXgbBY9FQBboQ66k0OnL81F5yzaFrsmay-jNRYQm7rT9gTsMKMv5_y-doEl_7kPpN3Coo3EyYCY-t0mdFgYytjp3wULliisGWj38MYxwzu63EYcNiKCLDE2xytLau3y92nQPfeL_YH7unoJsnhnZ-vfjLuH8qHQJke3XftYII6blS-5VT4tln6VM/s4624/5%20Medals.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="4624" data-original-width="3468" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhWCzvWXgbBY9FQBboQ66k0OnL81F5yzaFrsmay-jNRYQm7rT9gTsMKMv5_y-doEl_7kPpN3Coo3EyYCY-t0mdFgYytjp3wULliisGWj38MYxwzu63EYcNiKCLDE2xytLau3y92nQPfeL_YH7unoJsnhnZ-vfjLuH8qHQJke3XftYII6blS-5VT4tln6VM/s320/5%20Medals.jpg" width="240" /></a></div><br /><p></p><div><span style="font-family: courier; line-height: 17.12px;"><span class="x193iq5w xeuugli x13faqbe x1vvkbs x1xmvt09 x1lliihq x1s928wv xhkezso x1gmr53x x1cpjm7i x1fgarty x1943h6x xudqn12 x3x7a5m x6prxxf xvq8zen xo1l8bm xzsf02u x1yc453h" dir="auto"><div class="x11i5rnm xat24cr x1mh8g0r x1vvkbs xtlvy1s x126k92a"><div dir="auto"> </div></div></span></span></div>Debrahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13880320036500746309noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-324396822417492570.post-33516696609332239002023-07-31T15:45:00.005-06:002023-08-07T16:15:40.941-06:00My People!<p><span style="font-family: Courier; font-size: 13.5pt;">When
I was going through treatment for breast cancer, I expected it to be a One and
Done thing: Once it was over, I'd be done thinking about it! I’d suffer through the pains and indignities (and OH! the
indignities!) of treatment, then put it behind me. Never
speak of it again. Never think of it again. I was a writer, not a cancer patient or survivor. That’s what I
wanted my life to be about: Creativity. Not potentially life-ending illness.</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;"><span style="color: black; font-family: Courier; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-CA; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-ligatures: none;">Then
I joined the <a href="https://www.sistershipcalgary.com/" target="_blank">Sistership Dragon Boat team</a>. While the point of the team -- as I’ve
mentioned before -- is to condition ourselves to paddle competitively, we are
a team of survivors. The topic of cancer does come up now and then.</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;"><span style="color: black; font-family: Courier; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-CA; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-ligatures: none;">Like when
we were waiting to board our plane home from the Nanaimo Dragon Boat festival.
A few of my teammates were discussing a television show about a volleyball (or
was it soccer) team who took to cannibalism after their plane crashed.
When deciding who should be eaten first on our team, I raised my hand as a joke. I
added, however, to “avoid the right breast. It won’t taste right.” Rather than
be horrified or embarrassed or uncomfortable, my teammates met my gallows humour with
raucous laughter. That’s the beauty of being surrounded by “your people.”</span><span style="color: black; font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-CA; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-ligatures: none;"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;"><span style="color: black; font-family: Courier; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-CA; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-ligatures: none;">I
never wanted cancer to be my community. Sometimes, though, we don’t get to choose who gets
us. Sometimes we have to settle for being glad we fit somewhere, especially when we fit so
well. So, I wanted to give back to “my people.” But what could I offer? Well, I
decided I could offer my precious creativity.</span><span style="color: black; font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-CA; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-ligatures: none;"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;"><span style="color: black; font-family: Courier; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-CA; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-ligatures: none;">When
I was going through treatment, I had a tough time finding anyone who told me it
was okay not to look on the bright side. I could try to make it easier for others to find such a person.</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;"><span style="color: black; font-family: Courier; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-CA; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-ligatures: none;">I
wrote an article about why it was hard for me to embrace the positive thinking
that is so often exclusively promoted in breast cancer treatment. To my great
joy, the Globe and Mail published it in their <a href="https://www.theglobeandmail.com/life/first-person/article-i-had-to-fight-cancer-my-way-please-dont-tell-me-its-a-learning/" target="_blank">First Person column</a>:</span><span style="color: black; font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-CA; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-ligatures: none;"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;"><span style="color: black; font-family: Courier; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-CA; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-ligatures: none;">My
dragon boat teammates who read it were amazing! So encouraging and supportive -- even the
ladies I could have sworn were “bright-siders.”</span><span style="color: black; font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-CA; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-ligatures: none;"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;"><span style="color: black; font-family: Courier; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-CA; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-ligatures: none;">But
what completely touched me was that absolute strangers tracked me down to thank
me. They were facing or had faced their own diagnosis and treatment, and felt that my essay put their feelings into words at a time that they needed it.</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;"><span style="color: black; font-family: Courier; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-CA; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-ligatures: none;">It was exactly what I had wanted when writing the article… and I had no clue how good it would feel to get it. </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;"><span style="color: black; font-family: Courier; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-CA; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-ligatures: none;">My heart is so full!</span><span style="color: black; font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-CA; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-ligatures: none;"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;"><span style="color: black; font-family: Courier; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-CA; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-ligatures: none;">Thank
YOU, lady strangers!<o:p></o:p></span></p>Debrahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13880320036500746309noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-324396822417492570.post-73417846444466917152020-12-09T18:20:00.000-07:002020-12-09T18:20:18.780-07:00Wildlife Rescue Facts<p>Facebook shows me lots of videos of tourists/random people helping wildlife they've come across in trouble. Great. Glad to see it. </p><p>Just a quick note, though: you don't have to let the creature struggle and panic while you film it to show the dire situation it is in. You CAN put down the camera and <i>just help the creature</i>. (No, I'm serious. It is possible. I wouldn't lie about something so important.) You might want to sit down and prepare yourself, but wildlife can be helped <i>without </i>you filming it <i>at all</i>. Contrary to prevailing opinions, posting it publicly in a pitiful attempt to gain pats on your own back does not actually affect the survival rates of the wildlife you helped. (I know! I know! Blew my mind too!) </p><p>In fact:</p><div data-contents="true"><div data-block="true" data-editor="5boc8" data-offset-key="7ila3-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="7ila3-0-0"><ul style="text-align: left;"><li><span data-offset-key="7ila3-0-0">In many cases, the rescue goes much quicker -- and is less traumatic to wildlife -- if you use both hands instead of keeping one hand on the camera and one eye on whether you've framed yourself well</span></li></ul><ul style="text-align: left;"><li><span data-offset-key="5md94-0-0">If two people find wildlife in trouble, this should be a welcome development -- but not because it means one person can frame the shot while the other person tries to help. It should mean the creature can be helped that much faster because two people are doing it</span></li></ul><div>The more you know (... do do do doooooo ...).</div></div></div></div>Debrahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13880320036500746309noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-324396822417492570.post-32722129953632893642020-06-27T16:49:00.000-06:002020-06-27T16:53:16.363-06:00Mirrors, All<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-CA;">I originally drafted a post in May as response to the Washington Capitals
move to terminate Brendan Leipsic’s contract after he disparaged women and
teammates on social media.</span> Then the world hit the fan over racism. I
realized much of what I had intended to say about misogyny is very similar to
what I would say about racism. So, I guess it’s just as well I have been very
bad about following through on intentions these past few months. It is more economical
to speak on two atrocities at once.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-CA;">Like Leipsic’s misogyny, I'm very saddened by what I am now seeing is
widespread racism. I can speak on misogyny more honestly than racism, because
only the former has been directed at me. But I truly thought we were teaching
our young men better about women and that we as a people were better about race.
I was wrong. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-CA;">The advent of social media hasn’t brought about misogyny or racism. It
just began recording it for widespread distribution and posterity. Shining a
light on these injustices could have been a good first step in eradicating them. Instead, we as a society have taught these people that it doesn’t matter. They
can get away with whatever horse-crap they spew, as long as they use the right buzzwords
</span><span class="3l3x"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">in
a phony apology carefully drafted by a PR firm.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="3l3x"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">At
least you can get away with it if you’re literally and figuratively at the top
of your game. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
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<span class="3l3x"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Imagine
if what </span></span><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-CA;">Leipsic had said was said by C</span><span class="3l3x"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">rosby or Ovechkin or McDavid or
Matthews? (I'd like to hold onto my hope none of them would ever!</span></span><span class="3l3x"><span style="font-family: "segoe ui emoji" , sans-serif; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Emoji";">🤞</span></span><span class="3l3x"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">) I’m willing to bet that an insincere
apology would have been enough. Maybe they would have been fined. But they
would never have been let go. (I think the only real offense this kid made in
the eyes of the League was to diss his teammates. If Bill Peters had attacked
women in his past, he'd probably still be coach of the Flames. But he attacked
his players. That seems to be where the League draws the line.)<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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Most recently, Jessica Mulroney’s racism has come to light. True to celebrity
form, she believed that being caught out as a racist would be overlooked as
long as she issued a PR-drafted statement using such catch-phrases as: "It
was unacceptable and I humbly and fully apologize" <i>(she knows from others’
experiences, she doesn’t have to mean it, just has to say it)</i>; "I've
decided to step away from my professional engagements at this time to reflect,
learn and focus on my family" <i>(ie., she’s going to continue focusing
inwardly only on herself and her elitis</i><span class="textexposedshow"><i>t social
circle so she doesn’t have to see the pain she causes in others)</i>; and "I
know I need to do better" <i>(note: she didn’t say she INTENDS to do better)</i>.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span class="textexposedshow"><br /></span>
<span class="textexposedshow">It is most important to note, though, that these
words only came after she was caught publicly. When she was privately chastised
for her racist attempts to destroy the life of a woman of colour, she threatened
to sue that woman for TELLING THE TRUTH. Now Mulroney is SHOCKED she lost her
job at CTV. She believed the PR claptrap she spewed would give her a free pass.
And it may have, but for her gravest miscalculation: she believed she was a
bigger celebrity than she was. Her inflated sense of self made her think she was
untouchable. This begs the question: which haunts her more about this episode:
that the world knows she’s racist? Or that she’s not the A-List celebrity she
had assumed she was?</span><br />
<br />
Don’t get me wrong. I’m happy to see that some people
aren't getting away with being misogynist or racist by posting a phony buzzword
request for forgiveness. And punishing them in the only place they care about -
their wallets and their screen time – is a good start. But only when all can expect
consequences will we see any real change.<br />
<br />
We
also have to be honest about our role as a society in these atrocities. These disgusting
people were only playing by the rules we as a society had given them. We told
them that they can hate women or hate POC, and be vocal about the exact nature
of that hate, and nothing will happen to them as long as they say the PR buzzwords.
Say the PR buzzwords, and their life will go on as before. They are shocked and
dismayed that the world is reneging on our part of the bargain.<br />
<br />
Because
we are. And about it’s about time we did!Debrahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13880320036500746309noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-324396822417492570.post-67771228892741450642020-06-05T23:33:00.001-06:002020-06-05T23:33:57.718-06:00Vive La Revolution!Just a friendly reminder: Thanos is a fictional character. Racism can't be eradicated with the snap of a finger. It's going to take effort to change how things were up to now. And time to put in that effort. And steps to get there.<br />
<br />
If someone who hasn't been an ally before tries to be an ally now, negating their effort because they weren't always an ally isn't productive. They were wrong in the past. They can't go back and be right. They're trying to be right now. Let them try. You might get an ally where once you had an opponent. Block them from trying, though, and you'll most likely get your opponent back.<br />
<br />
If what someone does right today doesn't erase all the wrong someone else did yesterday... well, that's the way this all works. Change happens over the course of a period of time. What matters is someone did something today towards making a change. With momentum, more people can be doing right than are doing wrong. But momentum takes time. And people.<br />
<br />
Which brings us to: if someone takes a step in the right direction, don't disparage it because it's only one step. Of course it's one step. No one is saying it's anything more. But getting anywhere always and forever starts with one step. If someone stops after the first step and never takes another, then you have a legit complaint about someone half-assing it. But chastising someone who is trying to walk the right path because they aren't running full stride from a dead stop is counter-productive. Hound someone for why they don't have a longer stride and they'll stop trying to walk where you want them to go.<br />
<br />
Whatever challenge faces people, there is always a vocal contingent who demand change but then hypocritically seek to destroy any progress being made. These people attack anyone who takes action because it isn't far enough, or good enough, or fast enough out of the gate. They are in fact advocating that no action be taken, because no action can meet their criteria of instantaneously fixing the problem. By seeking to tear down anyone who is trying to better the situation, this contingent in fact blocks any real change from happening. Real change takes effort. And happens slowly. And in all cases must start with that critical first step in the right direction. All things that this contingent is vehemently opposed to.<br />
<br />
Make efforts to change. Support other's efforts to change. Call out hypocrites who seek to block change while pretending to champion it.<br />
<br />
p.s. There is a lot wrong with this world. A lot. But like a To Do list, we have to focus on one item at a time. If we need to wash the dishes, and gas up the car, and go grocery shopping, we can't just stand there staring at the list. We have to pick an item, and do it. Then we can move onto the next. And if while making a dent in the dishes and the car and the groceries we remember we also need a haircut, that shouldn't stop us from getting to the dishes, car, or groceries. Again, add it to the list, and it will have its time to be a priority.<br />
<br />
Bringing up all issues that need to be dealt with on this great blue-green globe of ours really just serves to dilute the discussion of what is before us and what are we going to do about it.<br />
<br />
Right now, police brutality is at the top of the list. No one is saying it's the only thing on the list. But right now, it seems pretty damn important to do what we can to save the lives of people. When we start making some progress there, then we can get to what else we've screwed up that we need to fix.Debrahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13880320036500746309noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-324396822417492570.post-57032838669788805602020-04-13T00:23:00.000-06:002020-04-13T00:23:15.849-06:00Shh!<span data-offset-key="4t54p-0-0">Before we get too happy about any news saying the social distancing and sheltering in place seems to be working, keep this in mind: when you're hiding in the closet because you woke to the noise of a burglar rummaging through your house, you don't come out the second the noise stops. You wait. You wait until you're good and sure the virus - I mean burglar - is good and gone. Because right now you're safe in the closet. Come out too quickly, and the hiding will have been for naught.</span>Debrahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13880320036500746309noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-324396822417492570.post-62722470404995998022020-03-24T12:45:00.004-06:002020-03-24T12:50:37.307-06:00Thoughts from the front lines:This weekend, I had planned to go grocery shopping Monday afternoon. I needed to complete my "stock up in case I get sick and can't leave" cupboard. When I went to bed Sunday night, though, I was feeling woozy, my mouth was dry, my heart was racing, and my muscles felt like bricks. Oh no! I thought. It's too late! I'm already sick.<br />
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
After a few minutes, I realized: I'm not sick. I'm <i>panicking</i>. Panicking at the thought of leaving my house to go to the grocery store!<br />
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
See, I'm one of the <i>lucky</i> ones who work at an entertainment facility that has cancelled its upcoming performances until further notice - which means I can hole up in my apartment without fear the wall will cough on me. (that also means I have no income right now... but that's another rant) As the popular meme floating around says: "Your grandparents were called to war. You're being called to sit on the couch. You can do this." Yes I can!</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
But after a week and a half of answering that call, the idea of <i>going out there</i> felt like I was bracing to race the zombies to the last can of Lysol spray. I realized I needed to get a hold of myself. I knew that if I took the recommended precautions, it would (probably) be okay. That, and I remembered I got some touch-screen compatible gloves as a wrap present from a tv show I had worked on a few years back - so now my bare hands need not touch any surfaces, not even the self-check out screens, in my supply mission!</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Flip side to the news: people continue to party on the beaches for Spring Break.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Don't they know I'm sacrificing my sanity as ordered over here? What's it all for if yahoos are allowed to extend the duration of the war with their pettiness, conspiracy theories, and egocentricity? </div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
So, I say look to wartime for inspiration here, too. Air Strikes.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Start hitting them at the edge of the beach and drive them into the water. Keep randomly strafing the beach to keep them dog paddling in the water for their two week self-isolation. If sharks cut the duration of their isolation short... well, they made their choices.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
It's war, people. We need to be in this together, or weeded out into the oceans to take your chances alone.</div>
</div>
Debrahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13880320036500746309noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-324396822417492570.post-3951603296657239962020-03-13T19:26:00.001-06:002020-03-13T19:31:22.827-06:00By all means, think of yourself<div>
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Whenever I see motorists who refuse to pull over for a fire truck or an ambulance or a police car -- because they're on the way to someplace themselves and they don't want to be inconvenienced by any delay -- I always think the same thing: if all you care about is yourself, then do that. Think of yourself. Maybe it's <i>your </i>house on fire. Maybe <i>your </i>kid was struck by a delivery truck. Maybe someone just robbed the gas station where <i>your </i>spouse was filling up and now has them hostage. You don't know it's not in your interest to make way for the emergency vehicle. Pretend it is, and you'll have no regrets later if you find out you were right.</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Same thing with COVID-19. Sure, maybe for whatever reason you're not at risk. Maybe you work from home anyway and don't interact with many people on a daily basis. Maybe because of that you assume that when you are out in public, precautions aren't meant for you. Only those at risk need wash their hands, or keep this distance, or take care who or what they touch. You're in the clear. And you were in the mood for a hockey game. Stupid closures and cancellations. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: inherit;">To which I say: by all means, think of yourself. <span style="font-size: 12pt;">Maybe tomorrow you'll eat some bad sushi or not cook your chicken stirfry as long as you should have, and will spend the next week on the toilet praying for death until you can take it no longer and head to the hospital. Maybe you're right as rain - right up until the moment your car slides on a patch of newly fallen snow and you slam headfirst into a city transit bus. Or may someone you care about will have just a run of the mill heart attack.</span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">You think just because your issue isn't COVID-19, there will be reserve doctors, nurses, and resources to help
you? Like out of the 25 possible hospital staff on a shift, five will be twiddling their thumbs until a non-COVID-19 case appears? You think they'll get you right in?</span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">We have a finite supply of resources, people. If we get to a place where triage is a
necessity, it ain't just gonna be COVID-19 sufferers we're triaging. So give medical staff and resources a break. Follow the precautions. Don't strain finite resources by creating cases or becoming one yourself.</span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">We actually will never know if the precautions and closures and cancellations were an overreaction. If we manage to slow the progression of the disease and our health facilities never reach their breaking point, we will never know if it was because of the actions we took in the coming days or because the outbreak was never going to overwhelm us in the first place. Personally, I'd rather live with that uncertainty rather than regret that the time to act passed while we waited.</span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: inherit;">And, before I leave you, I just have to send a special shout out to the Millenials I've personally heard complaining that they are being blamed for endangering people by not staying home from work. Apparently the argument being made is that they don't care who they put at risk because they themselves are not at risk - but they counter that if they could make rent if they stayed home they would, but they can't so there's nothing they can do. Give me a break. Just because you can't stay home from work doesn't mean you can't do anything. Staying home is <b>one </b>option. Double down on the other options available to you to help protect people who can't protect themselves. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: inherit;">(You're the people who terrified me when I had to go through chemo during the flu season two years ago.)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Kids, the way to shake that whiner reputation is to quit whining. Every generation blames the generation before for ruining everything. And every generation blames the one that came afterwards for being flippant and disrespectful of "the way things were." <i>Every </i>generation. You're the only ones who can't seem to get over it. Get over it.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: inherit;">And if you can't, create a Go Fund Me page to build a new hospital wing just for yourselves so you can self-soothe your hurt feelings, bruised egos, and inconvenienced lives. Maybe it'll be built next to the wing for COVID-19 sufferers so you'll be able to see firsthand what actual problems are.</span></div>
Debrahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13880320036500746309noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-324396822417492570.post-44034205215803325552020-02-24T22:13:00.000-07:002020-02-24T22:13:09.408-07:00Can a 50 year old learn to paddle a dragon boat?...We're going to find out!<br />
<br />
I have never been a team sport chick. Okay, not never. When I worked for the provincial government, I joined a Corporate Challenge volleyball team that was extraordinary because the people were fun AND we'd win! Huzzah! But until now, I haven't really been part of any ongoing team.<br />
<br />
Now I've joined a dragon boat paddling team! And I'm 50! Really, the only reason I considered it was because it is a team made up of breast cancer survivors. Different ages, shapes, sizes, and fitness levels. My age, shape, size, and fitness level had to fit in there somewhere!<br />
<br />
Tonight was my first dry land training date. 45 minutes in weight/aerobics training, then 45 at the side of the pool just paddling. As if we think we can move the pool over a few feet if ten of us sit at the edge and put our backs into it. That being said: it was super fun to sit at the edge of the pool and just put our backs into it. I can't wait for May when we can get onto the Glenmore Reservoir and into the actual dragon boat!<br />
<br />
The other great thing about this team is the fact that we are all breast cancer survivors. All these ladies have been where I've been. Some decades ago. Some a few years ago. One I think is still in the middle of chemo. (Bravo to her, by the way! I heard about this team a few months after I had finished chemo and radiation and that was still too early for me <i>to have even heard about it!</i>)<br />
<br />
But the point isn't the breast cancer. We aren't sitting around talking about our experiences and our challenges and rehashing old temperature spikes and sweaty wigs. It's there in the background for all of us, but we're there to strengthen our bodies and train so we can win some races! Knowing we have that backstory in common makes us kindred spirits on an experiential level. If we want to share, there's a willing ear. But the point of our gathering is to work together for something that has nothing to do with any of that - when there was a time (not too long ago for me) where <b>everything </b>was about that. I wasn't expecting to feel such a connection with women I barely know because of something no one is necessarily talking about.<br />
<br />
This bodes well for my joining this team, me thinks. I'll keeps you posted.Debrahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13880320036500746309noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-324396822417492570.post-88598739569539927882019-12-04T15:46:00.000-07:002019-12-04T15:46:33.131-07:00Not that I trust any politician, but...A world leader laughing along with laughing world leaders is accused
of not being able to act like a leader on the world stage. And of not
knowing how to treat an ally because of what he thought was privately
recounting the ridiculous behaviour - not <u>calling </u>the behaviour
ridiculous, but recounting behaviour that can only be considered
ridiculous - of a man who publicly, proudly, and without apology
disregards the needs and endangers the lives and political structure of
allies.<br />
<br />
The hypocrisy is strong with this news cycle. <span class="_5mfr"><span class="_6qdm" style="background-image: url("https://static.xx.fbcdn.net/images/emoji.php/v9/t30/1.5/16/1f928.png"); font-size: 16px; height: 16px; width: 16px;"></span></span>Debrahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13880320036500746309noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-324396822417492570.post-57388010064458753722019-12-03T22:42:00.000-07:002019-12-03T22:44:29.333-07:00Yawn<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-CA;">In the 90s, I read a trilogy reportedly approved by George Lucas,
written by Timothy Zahn, which continued the story of Luke, Leia and Han. In
it, Han and Leia married and had twins. A boy and a girl. The twins were strong
in the Force. Leia asked her twin Luke to train them to be Jedi.</span></div>
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<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-CA;">
<!--[if !supportLineBreakNewLine]--><br style="mso-special-character: line-break;" />
<!--[endif]--><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-CA;">The new Star Wars movie coming out is called "The Rise of
Skywalker". We already know one Skywalker is Kylo. Leia's child. Strong in the Force. Trained, at Leia's request, by Luke. Who has a connection to Rey, reminiscent of Luke's connection to Leia. Which is supposed to be inexplicable for someone who never crossed paths with Rey before. Like Luke supposedly never crossed paths with his twin Leia before.</span></div>
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<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-CA;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-CA;">Gee. What an
absolutely un-crackable mystery this titular Skywalker will turn out to be. (But at least it would explain why Leia hugged her instead of Chewie after Han died)</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-CA;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-CA;">*Yawn*</span></div>
Debrahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13880320036500746309noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-324396822417492570.post-25541078480830742662019-11-19T21:00:00.000-07:002019-11-19T21:00:24.639-07:00Listen, You Entitled Little Brat...<br />
I've been seeing people embrace and celebrate the phrase "Ok,
boomer" lately. I've found that this disturbs me. I've realized it's
because I believe people shouldn't be PROUD of being disrespectful. <o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
You may think you had cause to disrespect someone else. Perhaps you even
feel they disrespected you first. But showing anyone disrespect should not be
something you take pride<span class="textexposedshow"> in. It should be something
that you look back on, when you look at yourself in the mirror at the end of
the day, and say "Well. I could have handled that one better." </span><o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
Especially if your argument is they deserved it by disrespecting
you first. Because then you're saying it's wrong when others do it to you, but
it's something you take pride in when you do it to others. And if there's one
thing I abhor even more than disrespect, it's hypocrisy.<br />
Debrahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13880320036500746309noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-324396822417492570.post-10119370143924203682019-11-13T12:33:00.000-07:002019-11-13T12:34:24.458-07:00Wear A Damn Poppy!<br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;">I don't dislike Don Cherry. But let's face it, his patriotism has always
bled into the "anti-foreigner" camp. Usually anti-Europeans. Mostly the ones in the NHL. Again, that doesn’t mean that I dislike him. It means that I
disagree with the way that his mind seems to work. He is a voice from another
time. A voice from when we didn’t know better. And that voice has profited him
well, as it has many people who, like him, speak their minds regardless of consequence. That’s not a bad thing, being honest about
one’s opinion. Not staying silent because of who might react. It’s admirable on
its face. But this adds a different dimension which is less admirable: perpetuating stereotypes that have no basis in fact. Stereotypes which form the
basis of knee-jerk, us-vs-them rhetoric. We know better now than to foster that rhetoric. So,
I think moving on from Don Cherry was just a matter of time.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: inherit;">That isn’t what has captured my attention about this situation,
though. What captivates me is the slippery slope that we
so readily step upon without questioning.</span><span style="font-family: inherit;"> </span><span style="font-family: inherit;">Other people's
interpretations and conclusions regarding his words are slathered across the
internet and debated. It is usually described as “an anti-immigration rant.” Do you know that it was? Or are you just going along with what someone told you?</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<span style="font-family: inherit;">For what it’s worth, I believe he muddied a valuable topic - wearing poppies
to remember the fallen – with whiffs of anti-immigrant rhetoric. What he was saying
is hard to follow, because he is a walking non sequitur. When I heard it for myself, initially I thought
people were overreacting to his use of the phrase “you people”. To me, that easily
could have been referring to anyone who won’t honour the fallen with a poppy on
their lapel. (To which I agree: that's ungrateful and indefensible.) But when I listened again,
I heard those three words that came after you people: “They come here...” Those
three words don’t describe <i>anyone </i>who won’t wear a poppy. They describe people
who come here. They describe immigrants. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: inherit;">His defence may be that he was trying hard not to say that – that he was
actually trying to be sensitive now that we know better – but it leaked out
nonetheless. Maybe because that sentiment ping-pongs around in his head even
when he doesn’t mean to express it. I do believe his purpose was solely to
shame those who won’t wear poppies. (I agree: shame.) He just had a stream of consciousness
moment that organically included his default anti-foreigner position. But that
wasn’t what he was ranting about. And because it’s been said that it was, his
actual premise – wear a damn poppy, people! – has been lost.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: inherit;">It was simple for me to find out what other people thought about his words, but it took me 20-30 minutes to track down a video of his actual words to
decide what I think. Yes, it seems so much easier and therefore efficient </span><span style="font-family: inherit;">to base
your opinions on someone else’s. But it isn't effective. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-CA;"><br /></span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: inherit;">To that end, listen for yourself. Make your own decision:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> <a href="https://www.blogger.com/goog_1146295891"> </a></span><a href="https://youtu.be/uKrRw7Jfo4w">https://youtu.be/uKrRw7Jfo4w</a><o:p></o:p></span><br />
<br />Debrahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13880320036500746309noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-324396822417492570.post-92233197400917564032019-11-11T16:34:00.001-07:002019-11-13T12:07:05.301-07:00A RecapIf you want a recap, that is.<br />
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Years ago, my last post set off a reaction that is inexplicable to me to this day. How my statement that I was going to listen to myself above all others could have been interpreted as anything except empowering my own choices remains beyond me. Ironically, it put me off sharing my thoughts and feelings any more. I decided that being honest about where I was emotionally wasn't worth it if I had to labour under other people's reactions to that honesty. I decided it was best to keep it all to myself. Quite the opposite of empowering, you might say. And you'd be right.</div>
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<br /></div>
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What's changed since then? Events since that post have proven to me that getting my thoughts and feelings outside of myself is much less damaging to my physical and mental health than damming them up inside in an attempt to protect other's thoughts and feelings. </div>
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<br /></div>
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If my choice is between chancing someone else's negative opinions or my own health, I'm going to choose my health. Just to see what caring about myself is like for a change.</div>
Debrahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13880320036500746309noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-324396822417492570.post-52340780147072999782019-11-07T14:04:00.002-07:002019-11-07T14:04:31.193-07:00Is this thing on?Yes.Debrahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13880320036500746309noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-324396822417492570.post-57539718771376172492014-10-21T14:48:00.001-06:002014-10-21T14:56:35.123-06:00Apparently the problem is people...<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">“You need to decide:
television or movies.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You can’t try to
write both and expect either format’s producers to take you seriously.”<o:p></o:p></i><br />
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><o:p> </o:p></i><br />
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">“These days you have
to be a generalist.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You have to show you
can be flexible and have proficiency in a wide range of formats.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>No one will take a chance on a new writer who
appears to have a tunnel-vision approach to the industry.”<o:p></o:p></i><br />
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><o:p> </o:p></i><br />
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">“Stick to one
genre.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If you write comedy, become known
as the go-to comedy writer.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Anyone
seeing you’ve written comedy specs and drama specs will think - and rightly so
- that not only do you not know what you are doing, you don’t even know what
you want to do.”<o:p></o:p></i><br />
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><o:p> </o:p></i><br />
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">“Have spec scripts in
a wide range of genres.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There’s too much
money on the line for anyone to take a chance on someone whose abilities may be
limited.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If you can’t show them you can
do more than one genre, they’ll assume you can’t.”<o:p></o:p></i><br />
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><o:p> </o:p></i><br />
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">“Send me a half-hour,
a one hour, and a feature sample of your writing please.”<o:p></o:p></i><br />
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><o:p> </o:p></i><br />
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">“Just send me your
one hour, please.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> Just so you know, d</span>on’t bother writing
half-hours or features if you’re hoping to get a job with one hour dramas.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You’re never going to get anyone asking for
anything but a one hour.”<o:p></o:p></i><br />
<o:p> </o:p><br />
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">“Welcome to the
company.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Unfortunately, we’re in a bit
of a time crunch for the next few months, so we can’t train you very much for a
while - just do A, B, C and D… and when we have more time, we’ll go through it
all with you so you can actually learn your job rather than just put out small
fires as they happen.”<o:p></o:p></i><br />
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><o:p> </o:p></i><br />
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">“As you know, three
months of any new job is a probationary period.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>We’re sorry, but you don’t seem to be working out.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We need to be able to give you more
responsibilities but we don’t think you know what you’re doing with the ones
you already have.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We’re going to have to
let you go.”<o:p></o:p></i><br />
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<o:p></o:p> </div>
Sigh.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>People.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Is it any wonder my mantra of late is “I don’t
know” ?<o:p></o:p><br />
<o:p> </o:p><br />
Okay.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So people are
off the table.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>People had their chance
and people have no business speaking to me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><o:p></o:p><br />
<o:p> </o:p><br />
My mirror is my guide.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>My gut.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My sensibilities.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Just because you haven’t done it this way
doesn’t mean I can’t.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Indeed, it probably
means I should because no one else will see it coming.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
(That, and if anyone hires you because you have no
experience so they can train you how they want you to do the job? Smile
politely, rise, shake their hand, thank them for their time but let them know you’ve
been there, done that, and it’s never worked out the way they think it will.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Not when they're hiring a waitress.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Not when they're hiring an assistant in a payroll
company.)</div>
Debrahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13880320036500746309noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-324396822417492570.post-18865668380171483612014-07-03T13:23:00.001-06:002014-07-03T13:23:32.894-06:00Volunteers ≠ Traffic PylonsI believe I am done. Volunteering for small film festivals, that is.<br />
<br />
Last year I volunteered at one that told everyone to come two hours earlier than necessary. When someone from the festival finally showed (two hours later), his only comment was "Yeah, we originally needed everyone at five, but then we figured out that would be too early." I see. But you didn't figure out you should tell any of your volunteers this. Later, after I had been told not to let anyone else in because we were at capacity, I apologized and turned away the next person who showed up. He turned to one of the festival organizers - the one who had told me to turn away people - to complain. The organizer said "Oh, she's just a volunteer. I'm telling you you can go in." <br />
<br />
Alrighty. So when that festival mass emailed all previous volunteers to ask if we're coming back, I promptly allowed it to go right in my recycle bin.<br />
<br />
Last week I volunteered five days for a different festival, one that focusses solely on the work of female directors. In retrospect, there were a number of red flags I ignored, not the least of which was that I had sent in my volunteer application two months ago and never heard a peep that I was accepted as a volunteer until two weeks before the event asking me for my availability. Three days before the festival was to start, I still hadn't heard when I had been actually scheduled. I should have known then that while this association believed they need volunteers, they didn't believe volunteers were of any priority.<br />
<br />
Three of my shifts were meant to be supporting their workshops. I thought that would mean setting things up, assisting at registration and striking the room. Nope. It was sit on a folding chair in a hallway outside the seminars "in case anyone comes by looking for the workshop, you can point them to the right door." How do I know this? Not because anyone from the festival met me at the start of my shift and explained my role. (I had even texted the volunteer coordinator when I showed up and wasn't sure what to do... to this day, she never responded.) No, I knew this because my volunteer partner who showed up later explained that that's what she did the day before. When someone from the festival did show up an hour later, I was expecting to get more direction. Nope. Over the course of the next four and a half hours, my fellow volunteer and I took turns excusing ourselves from each other to stroll around the building, check out the café, or just be anywhere but in a folding chair staring at one another in an empty hallway.<br />
<br />
On my second day at the workshops, we did get a table of brochures in the hallway to try to foist on passersby so we could at least look like we were there for a reason. The founder of the festival did stop by, and told us vast amounts of information about what needed to be done first thing the next day. When we explained we weren't scheduled for first thing the next day, she asked who was? I suggested she call the volunteer coordinator and ask her that. The founder just walked away.<br />
<br />
I was called into action once this day. When the facilitator came out in the hallway with a bunch of dirty dishes, she called out into the void (even though we were sitting just two feet to her right) "Could I get a volunteer to grab these from me?!" I jumped up and took the towering stack of dishes. The facilitator said "I don't know where they go." and disappeared back into the room, closing the door on me.<br />
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The third workshop day, the door to the workshop room was actually open. I went in, went up to the facilitator, and introduced myself as a volunteer. "If you need anything, I'm your gal." He said "Nope." Oh. Kay. The seminar started, I sat down in a chair at the back of the room - and he pointed to the hallway. Sadly, I wasn't bright enough to bring my chair with me out the room I had just been excused from, as once I closed the door behind me, I saw there were no chairs. Apparently, for this five hour shift, I was to stand in the hallway. I thought alone, until another volunteer came up and greeted me. Turns out, she had been standing in the hallway all morning with no direction or task. I shared with her my own experience over the past few days with this festival. We both looked at each other, not saying what either of us were thinking. I'm not proud of what happened next:<br />
<br />
"So," she finally broke the silence, "what are you saying you're going to do?"<br />
<br />
"Um," I replied, "I think I'm going to do what I think you're going to do." Silence "I think I'm going to leave."<br />
<br />
Beat. "I think I am too."<br />
<br />
We looked at each other for another moment. Then she put out her hand "Well, it was nice to meet you. Have a good day."<br />
<br />
We shook hands and parted ways.<br />
<br />
For the rest of the day, I was expecting a call, or an email, or a text asking where the heck was I. Nope. <br />
<br />
Not even the next day, my last shift for the festival, where I saw both the volunteer coordinator and the festival founder. I think neither had any clue the volunteers had walked out the day before. Or didn't care enough about that fact to call out one of those volunteers even when she was standing right in front of them. I did some actual volunteer work for about half an hour, then was told there's nothing else to do so I could go in and watch the movie if I wanted. (Why the hell didn't I volunteer all five days at this location?! ) So, for the next three hours, I just sat in the theatre and watched the movies. Came out a couple of times to ask if they needed anyone or anything. Nope. So back in I went.<br />
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Moral of the story? You can't swing a dead cat without hitting an organization that wants a volunteer. Some want to give people some experience in exchange for their efforts because there's not enough money to pay for the help. Others just want traffic pylons they don't have to pick up from the department of transportation. I need to do a better job ferreting out which is which, and apparently small film festival is a good place to draw the line.Debrahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13880320036500746309noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-324396822417492570.post-76597919166675556602014-05-17T11:40:00.004-06:002014-05-17T11:40:48.458-06:00Random Posting for Amusement Purposes:Found in some old newspaper clippings I've kept because they tickled my funny bone:<br />
<br />
<em>"It's hard to say you're sorry, especially when you're infallible. But Benedict offered words of apology. He's sorry people felt bad. That's known in Vatican terminology as a "me-a-kinda." It's a time-honoured tradition in the Catholic Church dating back to the Inquisition when Pope Innocent IV said, 'We deeply regret the fact that so many non-believers happen to be flammable.' "</em><br />
<br />
(I don't recall the story to which this refers. I would cite the author or the paper if I could, for this is no doubt deserved of citation.)Debrahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13880320036500746309noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-324396822417492570.post-36332595338876920652014-01-19T20:10:00.000-07:002014-01-19T20:10:09.435-07:00Fire on the mountain - run boys, run!Ecch. I had me some plans for this here New Year. Big plans. Good plans about what I'd do, starting bright and early Jan 1. Then Jan 1 came, and all I could do was languish in bed coughing and choking on my sore throat and cursing my social activities over the holidays -- because that's where germs are, boys and girls. On other boys and girls!!<br />
<br />
I had every single solitary intention of starting this blog over with much more positive thoughts than I had in past. But heck, since the year's already blown anyway :<br />
<br />
<span class="userContent" data-ft="{"tn":"K"}">Note to Tortorella: Saturday's face off was an abomination. Period. But if you send your dancers out to what you suspect will be a promenade, you have no right to track the fiddler down at first intermission feigning outrage that a square dance broke out.</span><br />
<span class="userContent" data-ft="{"tn":"K"}"></span><br />
<span class="userContent" data-ft="{"tn":"K"}">Happy 2014!</span>Debrahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13880320036500746309noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-324396822417492570.post-76401769762745442712013-11-05T21:24:00.000-07:002013-11-05T22:04:55.674-07:00Upon deep and serious contemplationI have been ranting since last Thursday, both on FB and in my front room to my television. I have been too angry to really articulate my thoughts here until I saw this online today:<br />
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<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-qYxkBUSVgWc/UnnB-QGZO0I/AAAAAAAAA08/j30tVW4BPeU/s1600/crack.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="217" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-qYxkBUSVgWc/UnnB-QGZO0I/AAAAAAAAA08/j30tVW4BPeU/s320/crack.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
It was just so... apt.<br />
<br />
The unprecedented level of hypocrisy, flagrant and pathological dishonesty, flippant disregard for lawful behaviour, and an inexplicably overinflated commitment to his own untouchable sense of entitlement... I was at a loss. I truly never thought a politician could sink lower in my estimation than he/she could by simply being a politician. Kudos. He's taken a subset of society for whom I had no previous respect or admiration (with barely a handful of exceptions), and made those who came before him kings in my eyes. <br />
<br />
No one - and I am talking NO ONE - has ever made me feel better about the homophobic knee-jerk conservatism of my home province politicians than this guy. And no one has ever made me feel better about the men and women back home who put them in power, than the people here who support this guy. THIS is who they've asked to stand in their stead, to speak for them, to act on their behalf?<br />
<br />
They owe me, and all other decent Toronto citizens like me, an apology.Debrahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13880320036500746309noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-324396822417492570.post-52409355115133937862013-10-10T17:00:00.001-06:002013-10-10T17:12:55.423-06:00This is why we can't have nice stuff!People gripe about funding for the arts.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s all touchy-feely, hippie crap, am I
right?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And by that I mean, you think money
spent on the arts is like tossing cash into the crapper, for as much good as it offers
the world at large.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
Well, it’s harder for me to convince you of the fallacy of
that argument when a recent city-wide all night arts festival offered the
following “pieces”:<o:p></o:p></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">“An artist/poet
silently wanders the financial district completely covered in Velcro-like
hooked burdock seedpods accompanied by two assistants and a docent.”<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">“Two driverless luxury
sedans circle each other in an endless figure eight, teetering on the verge of
collision but never quite doing so.”<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">“Participants spin a
wheel of fortune to select questions that are put to a 12-foot tall child
oracle who offers answers privately over headphones.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>These relatively benign proceedings are made
menacing by the vengeful spirit of an even larger inflatable hanging spider
exploring the night as the locus of imaginary fears.”<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">“A photography
professor hoists personal messages about emotional states up a flagpole.”<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">“Celebrate Toronto’s squirrel
population with knitted and felted portraits.”<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">“Wearing a soft
sculpture made of stuffed toys, an artist wanders the area hugging passersby.”<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">“A 12-hour-long
sentence made of 12,000 proverbs from around the world is read from the church
pulpit.”<o:p></o:p></i></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
Don’t get me wrong.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The
existence of this art is not my issue.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Calling
it art isn’t even my issue.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s whether
or not I, as a taxpayer, paid for any of the above.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Do I know for a fact that any of the above received
any manner of public funding?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I do
not.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Who is to be the judge of what is
art and what is not, and thereby what is “worth” being funded – me? <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I don’t really think so.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> So w</span>hat am I saying is the solution?<br />
<br />
Well, art doesn't have to have a solution, does it? Art can simply be about expressing or
eliciting an emotional state or reaction.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>It can be successful by simply instigating the discussion. So consider this post my art *. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
<span style="font-size: x-small;">[* </span></span><span style="font-size: x-small;">No taxpayer was harmed – or fleeced – in the creation or execution of this art.]<o:p></o:p></span></div>
Debrahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13880320036500746309noreply@blogger.com0